How do we work on self-esteem in our psychology consultation?

Nowadays there are multiple techniques that can help us when it comes to increasing our self-esteem and self-care. However, when choosing which of them to carry out in therapy, it is convenient Know the patient's context and preferences. In this way, the therapeutic process will be done in an individualized way and based on the needs of the person.

Techniques to work on self-esteem and help during your change process:

• Make a list of your strengths: As a general rule, we tend to keep our mistakes more in mind than our successes. Through this exercise we "force ourselves" to invest a bit of our time in compiling the virtues we possess and the things we do well. When writing the list, we must distinguish between: compliments that you remember that other people have told you, abilities and strengths that you consider you possess, and things that you have achieved for which you feel proud.
• The self-gift box: The purpose of this activity is to promote self-care and for the person, almost without realizing it, to spend time a day doing activities that generate well-being. How is it done? We ask the patient to write down on several pieces of paper pleasant things that he can do for himself on a daily basis. It is not about writing big things, but small non-material actions: reading a book that you have been wanting to read for a long time, taking a walk in a nice place, chatting with a friend, playing sports, etc. The next step is to put all the pieces of paper in a box. Every day, the person must pick one at random and commit to carry it out.
• Set realistic goals: It is essential that the person learn to formulate their goals realistically and develop action plans. The action plans will help the patient to clarify what are the specific behaviors that he is going to carry out to achieve her goals. Learning to exercise patience will also be of great help, since when we want to achieve things quickly, we become demotivated when we see that we do not achieve what is expected. From here, we propose to guide the patient to achieve small achievable goals, before achieving the final objective. In this way, self-esteem and the feeling of achievement will increase when seeing that he is achieving small goals.
• Become aware of the way we talk to ourselves: This activity focuses on the way in which people often talk to ourselves. We tend to be much harder on ourselves than on other people, and we also use words that, far from comforting us, undermine our self-esteem. The objective is to teach the patient to identify situations in which they do not speak correctly automatically. Above all, it is important to highlight and explain that when we make mistakes, instead of beating ourselves up through an internal discourse, we must offer constructive criticism that leads us to improve.
• Learn to take care of personal relationships: Devoting part of our time to cultivating our friendships or our relationship as a couple will be essential when it comes to feeling good about ourselves. From here, we help the patient to make the decision to resolve pending conflicts or to establish new links, so that the person has a quality support network.